Lacking inspiration today, I have decided to reprise my Easter Rant. Many things about this holiday need fixing. And if everyone listens to me, I will be happy and that is what counts. Enjoy.
In 325 AD a group of Christian leaders got together in a room and tried to settle, among other things, the Easter mess. It was a mess because people around the world were setting the date of Easter on different days of the week and at different times during the spring season. The work the council did lead to a fix. But I think right now we need to get everyone together in room and fix the fix, as well as some other things surrounding modern Easter.
Every year the date of Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon on or after the vernal equinox. Did you understand that – because I don’t. But it gets worse. The church has fixed the equinox to March 21st. However, the real equinox can be a day before or a day after. And so if the real equinox and the full moon is March 20th, then that’s not the full moon the church uses to set Easter. It will be the next one later in April. I think this system is dumb and does not work in the modern world. We have to get together and fix the date to the second Sunday of April so I don’t have to figure out when it is every year.
Speaking of change, what is with the bunny rabbit? This symbol of fertility and the rebirth of the world in springtime came from German immigrants and became very popular after the civil war. I don’t know about you but I don’t see any rabbits procreating around my home in the spring or any other time of the year. So I propose that we change the symbol of Easter to the mosquito. As soon as spring comes they come and as far as procreating rabbits can’t hold a candle to them. What do you say? Let’s get together and talk.
Why do we give kids candy during Easter? My kids get hyper, lose their teeth, and fight over the big chocolate bunny. Other than aggravation, what do I get out of it? We need to get together in a room and decide to give the kids something useful. Like turkeys and hams. A great gift that lowers my food bill.
And finally we should do something about the name. The word Easter has German roots. Estre was the goddess of the rising light of day. Brought to England by the Saxons the word was applied to the Christian holiday. But this is not what Easter is about. It is the day that celebrates the hope of a new life that will extend into eternity. It is the day that Christians all around the world believe is the sure sign that there is more to this life than daily struggles. We believe Jesus rose from the dead and promised that we would do the same. The name Easter should be changed to Resurrection Day.
And so some changes need to be made. We should get together in a room somewhere and fix these things, as well as a few other minor problems like world peace, eliminating hunger and poverty – stuff like that. Now I think I will go and arrange to get at that chocolate bunny before the kids do.
Happy Resurrection Day